How To Handle a Drunk Angry Girl

This is filled with bad advice. Bad advice written by me, so please don’t take this seriously.

When a girl gets drunk and angry, there’s a reason behind it. It’s normally a build-up of a number of things, and when she has that one drink too many; the one that tips her over the edge, it all comes out. It doesn’t make sense. It probably won’t be in a very nice manner, and it will most definitely baffle any man.I’m the worst for this. I can go out in the happiest mood in the world, in the prettiest dress, with the highest heels, and if something flicks that switch inside my head, the bitch comes out. And she’s a proper bitch too.

She’ll make shit up in her head. She’ll be adamant that it happened, even though it probably didn’t, and no amount of reasoning will make her see otherwise. She’ll focus on that one negative thing you said, take it completely out of context and twist it so much, it doesn’t even resemble the original conversation you had in the first place. No one understands how the brain twists things quite so much – not her friends, not the bouncers in the club, and one hundred percent not her boyfriend/husband/lover.

This is exactly the reason why I rarely drink anymore. I can’t handle the hangovers, I can’t handle my drink, and I can’t handle my inner bitch. I get angry about anything when I’ve had too much to drink, and I’ll try to start fights with anyone stupid enough to come near me.

So how do you handle the drunk angry girl? Everything you say is twisted against you. Everything you do seems to cause offence. She’s cruising for a fight, friends … It doesn’t really matter what you do. She won’t remember it enough to be mad at you the next day, and she’s probably going to be more embarrassed by her own behaviour.

The thing you need to remember here is that alcohol alters her mind. It makes her say and do things she would never normally dream of. She’s not really herself when she’s drinking, you know?

Whatever she says and does, ignore. She doesn’t mean a word of it. Not a single word. She has no clue what she’s doing. She won’t remember it the next day. The less you remind her of, the better. She’ll cringe with embarrassment if she’s got any class about her. Just put it down to a heavy booze-fuelled night, and let it go. Don’t bring it up in conversations, don’t take the piss out of her for it. Just let it go. Shush.

She’ll be angry at first when she wakes up. Again, just ignore it. She’s probably still drunk. She’s not back to her normal self just yet… After a while, she’ll calm down enough to have a conversation about it. Brief and to the point is your best tactic here; just get it over and done with like pulling off a plaster.

At the end of the day, there’s nothing you can do to stop this storm once it’s started so you might as well just accept that it’s a shit night and move on. Don’t take the crap she says to heart. She doesn’t mean a word of it. And don’t play too much on it the next day, she’ll get angry when she gets embarrassed and there’s likely to be a few tears…

THIS IS EXACTLY WHY I BARELY DRINK.

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